“Again, please!” says Peanut. “You want me to read Swimmy again?” I ask. “Yes, I like this book,” says Peanut. After about 5 times through, I’m kind of bored of Swimmy, although it is a fantastic book. I suck it up and start reading again. This time, I pause as I read, leaving space for Peanut to fill in the words, just testing to see how much he remembers. We’ve begun story retelling! Continue reading “How and Why to Teach Story Retelling to Your Child”
A Lighthearted Look at the Status of My Parenting Adventures
Some days I’m a frazzled mess. I share more similarities with the street cat that frequents our garden space than a human being. Maybe it’s because the five people I spend the most time with are my kids, husband, that annoying cat and a cricket.
Parenting Is Tough
Sometimes it’s challenging to spend all your time with consuming little beings. All of the “I want, I need” all day and all night is exhausting. Does this mean I should seek out better people so that I can become an average of 5 great people instead of letting the little ones drag me down? Assuming that great people always lift you up, don’t make you angry, tired or discouraged is nonsense.
Continue reading “A Lighthearted Look at the Status of My Parenting Adventures”
The Number One Best Writing Inspiration For Kids – FREE RESOURCE
“I don’t know what to write about!”
“I can’t think of any ideas!”
“I don’t wanna write a story!”
These are common complaints of elementary aged students who have been asked to write. They either have too many ideas and don’t know where to start or are completely uninspired.
Unfortunately, the best way to improve writing is by writing. So, if you’re a teacher or parent hoping to improve writing skills, you’ve got to get the kids to write.
As an elementary school teacher and at the library program I run, the best inspiration I’ve found by FAR are photo prompts. What better inspiration is there? At the very least, students can write a vivid description of what they see, which often leads them to other ideas that may turn into a story. Others are instantly on task, beginning a wild tale that begins with a quick look at a crazy photo. Here’s one of my favorites:
What child doesn’t want to write about waking up to a sink full of gummy bears?
Continue reading “The Number One Best Writing Inspiration For Kids – FREE RESOURCE”
Guaranteed No Tears At Mealtime
“Ok hunny, I’ll pop some chicken nuggets in the toaster for you,” said none of our great-grandparents ever.
Don’t you think some of the troubles little ones have with eating and mealtime are really due to society’s recent trend towards using processed foods? The convenience of popping some chicken nuggets in the microwave or grabbing some crackers for the toddler is a relatively new reality. And no parent wants to see their child go hungry, so it’s no wonder our children demand an alternative to lentil stew. We give in because we can. There are easy alternatives calling from the kitchen “hellooooo…anyone want some crackers?”
But, by giving in and allowing these alternatives, we’re creating picky eaters that are on a path towards leading an unhealthy lifestyle.
So, how, you ask, do you avoid the tears at mealtime? How do you navigate the refusal to try a bite of green beans?
Dropper Painting: A FUN Preschool Activity
What’s more fun than painting? Dropper painting. If your little one has already become a pro at using a paintbrush, why not add in another interesting element? There are many ways to paint, and one that we just discovered at our house is dropper painting.
Most mothers with young children have accrued a fairly large quantity of medicine droppers. We have loads! So, I thought rather than tossing them, we’d have fun painting with them. Below is everything you need to know about dropper painting:
Materials
- Droppers, one for each color of paint
- Tempera paints
- Old containers, I used yogurt cups
- Paper, I recommend using a fairly sturdy option – ours was too thin and got a bit wrinkled when it dried!
For each color, mix a tiny little bit of water with the paint so it’s slightly more runny than usual. This makes it easier to draw it up into the dropper.
Teach It!
As a Montessorian, I always teach by example. I showed my little peanut how to get paint with the dropper and drip it onto the page. After one demonstration, he was off and running! The only tricky part seemed to be getting the paint into the dropper. So, I reinforced by telling him to “squeeze” and “let go” with the dropper still in the paint.
What Benefits Are Gained with Dropper Painting?
- Your child will develop his or her pincer grip
- Your child can learn about color mixing
- Your child will enjoy expressing themselves artistically
Pincer what? The pincer grip is the grip we use to hold a pen or pencil. Young children must develop their fine motor skills to be able to execute this grip. Any activities that practice this grip (using the pointer finger, middle finger and thumb) help strengthen your child’s muscles, preparing them to have more control as they begin writing and drawing.
My little peanut used yellow and blue. Towards the end of the activity, he began experimenting with mixing. Now, we’ve done this before, so I got comments like “Lets see what color it makes when we mix blue and yellow!” and then “Look, Mama it’s green!” Children almost always enjoy color mixing I find!
So, what are you waiting for? Get out those old medicine droppers, some paint and make some art!
Here’s my peanut having fun with this activity:
How to Teach Your Child the ABCs and a FREE ABC Book
My little peanut has shown quite a bit of interest in learning his letters at the age of 3 and a half. We’ve pursued his interest by using Nell, which is actually a great app for little ones. I helped create the Montessori based curriculum that the app uses. With this app, Peanut learned the letters in his name and a few others.
We haven’t been very regular about practicing, and I’ve been working more lately so there’s been less time to focus on activities with him. When we do spend time together that doesn’t involve eating, doing chores or going to bed, we usually read books or do a craft.
But, that’s changing because we’re setting aside at least 10 minutes each day to work on his ABC book. What’s an ABC book?
Basically, it’s a book with one page for each letter of the alphabet. On each page, your child can practice tracing the letter. There’s also space for cut-outs or drawings of words that begin with that letter sound.
You can see below I helped peanut draw a monkey and he drew a very faint moon, the circle on the right-hand side of the page. Here you can see he’s starting to trace the “m”s. Yes, he’s a lefty! And that pincer grip is looking pretty good I must say. Go peanut!
Here are some of the important things to know when working on an alphabet book:
Use Phonics
Children learn letters most easily by teaching phonetic sounds. That means instead of teaching letter names like “A” as in play, letter sounds are taught. So the “a” would be taught “aaaa” as in apple.
Each time you get out a new page, look at the letter together. Say the sound. Ask your child to repeat the sound. Then, get started thinking of words that begin with that sound and draw together or look for pictures in a magazine to cut out.
Take Your Time
Don’t expect your little one to learn a new letter every day. You should mix in other letter activities to reinforce each letter. We enjoy drawing with sidewalk chalk, using cardboard letters and using the app, Nell, to practice. There are so many ways to practice! I’ll be posting some more ideas soon.
What Order?
The Montessori curriculum recommends teaching in an order that helps children notice differences between letters. In the traditional alphabet, the letters “b” and “d” are very close together. Also, children aren’t able to form words quickly using this order.
So, I recommend teaching in this order:
a, s, m, e, t, c, o, p, u, d, f, j, g, l, b, i, n, w, r, h, y, q, z, k, v, x
This way, children can quickly form words such as “sam, sat, met, set, mat, cat” within learning 5 or 6 letters. That’s great!
**Note** The book I’ve included goes in alphabetical order, so feel free to print out and mix them up according to the order you prefer.
Some people also choose to begin by teaching a child the letters in their name.
What Font?
I chose basic print for our book. Also notice that I’ve only focused on lowercase. In the Montessori curriculum, children learn lowercase first because the majority of what we read is written with lowercase letters. Learning lowercase is the most efficient way to start to read.
Get Your FREE ABC Book
I made a quick and easy abc book using a great worksheet creator. For our book, I included lots of animals because that’s what peanut likes the best! For other children, consider making changes to tailor to their interests. For example, change the “tiger” to “truck” or “tree”. Just be careful with the vowels because pronunciation of these letters is very important. For example, the letter “i” needs to be the sound you hear when saying “igloo” not “ice”. After learning phonics, kids pick up reading pretty quickly!
Get your FREE copy of our ABC book here!
Happy learning!
The 3 Golden Rules for Saying “No” to Your Child
So many parents struggle with setting limits. The simple act of saying “no” can seem exhausting because you must usually repeat it about 50 gazillion times. And then there’s the not listening. Here are my three golden rules for how to say “no” and mean it:
1. Don’t Say “No”
Counter-intuitive right? I’m not kidding though. The funny thing is that the youngest of children seem to hear “yes” when you say “no”. And it isn’t because their hearing is off.
For this reason, Dr. Maria Montessori believed that positive language should be used when talking to children. If you’re wondering what that means, basically it means saying “Walk, please” instead of “Don’t run!” So, you’re still saying “no”, but they’re not hearing the “run” part which is exactly what they’ll want to keep doing.
2. Set a Limit You’ll Keep
Lately with my little peanut, our limit is counting to 10. He’s got 10 seconds to take care of the problem on his own, or I’ll help him do it. Examples?
- “Play gently with your sister…or I’ll help you play somewhere else.” Whack! There goes the stuffed animal again right in her face. “Ten seconds, pumpkin or we’ll move somewhere else.”
- “Put the riding toy away now, it’s too loud.” He continues to ride. “You have 10 seconds to put it away by yourself or I will help you…1…2…3…”
Obviously counting to 10 doesn’t work for everything. So, I often use another strategy that equally sets a limit. For this one, it’s often due to a case of whiny “if I continue to badger mama she’ll eventually give in and it’s because I really want some candy or ice cream and I’m probably a little bit tired so I can’t think of anything else to do and I wanna whiiiiiiine.” Sound familiar? For THOSE situations I break out this fantastic answer:
“I’m all done answering that question. You heard me.”
Then, I zip it and don’t respond to the issue anymore. If peanut has a fit after that, it’s up to him.
Following a fit or tantrum, I try to connect with him in a positive way. For example, find something to laugh about together, offer to read a book or do some art.
Now, the secret to this second limit-setting rule is that you HAVE to keep your promise. So, a consequence of throwing your kid out the window, not an option. But, if you threaten to remove TV privileges, you’d better follow through.
However, the best options are directly related to the behavior. With young children, you can often gently help them comply. With older children, sometimes a fair warning about potential natural consequences, and then letting these happen, is the best medicine. For example, not helping with laundry could result in running out of clothes to wear. Or, having a messy room could result in losing things.
3. Say Why
Kids want to know why. Although they might not agree with you in the moment, knowing why you’re saying “no” can help them learn. Perhaps you’re saying “no” because what your child is doing isn’t safe. Or, perhaps it isn’t healthy. Explaining why the answer is “no” can sometimes help.
These are my golden rules for saying “no”, or getting that message across anyway, to my kids. What are yours?
Need more ideas on how to hold your ground? Read my post about how to avoid undermining yourself as a parent.
Photo Credit: photo “I’m seeing you!” via photopin license
Yikes! I would have spent how much on jam???
So many mundane expenses don’t even enter onto our radar until we add them up and think about them in terms of monthly or yearly expenses. Like so many who write about dropping a coffee habit and saving big bucks, I’ve come to that realization about many normal purchases. For instance, jam.
I grew up in a home where my parents (not just mom!) made preserves. Peaches, applesauce, sometimes tomato juice and pickles were staples that got canned each year. Sweet corn was gleaned, cooked and frozen. And of course freezer jam was made each year in June.
I hadn’t quite figured out how to manage preserves just yet in my life here in Guatemala. Part of it was because I was managing to survive on an itty bitty teeny weeny refrigerator that was literally a cube of about 2.5 ft squared. Don’t ask me how I survived on that for 7 years, we just made do.
Space to Freeze
Now I have a brand spanking new (HUGE) refrigerator, complete with a real freezer. The first thing my husband said was that it’s too big. Oh but I had plans for freezing. He has since been proven wrong, very wrong. I’ve frozen pureed squash, chicken and meat and made amazing refrigerator pickles. Additionally, I’ve made freezer jam.
My little peanut LOVES to eat strawberry jam. When he won’t eat anything else, he’ll say “Mama, can I have bread with jelly please?” If I would let him, I’m sure he would eat it for every meal.
It’s So Expensive!
But, I’ll be honest. The jelly and jam selection here is either disgusting or very expensive. At about $3 a jar for the good stuff, that I’d probably go through in about a week or week and a half, that’s $150 a year in jam. Yikes! However, by making it myself, I bring that number down to about $3 a month, or $36 a year. And, I have the added assurance of knowing what I put in my jam. Strawberries, jell-o and sugar. That’s it. Maybe one of these days I’ll get around to posting how I make it.
Why Is the First Instinct to Buy?
My point is, isn’t it ridiculous how we’ve been trained to buy even the simplest of products? Making jelly takes me about 15 minutes. It’s as complicated as rinsing the berries, stemming them, blending them, popping in a pot with dissolved jello, adding sugar and pouring it into a few plastic tubs. It’s easy peasy. I’m also making my own apple cider vinegar and have started making my own yogurt. Both of these are a fraction of the cost when home-made vs. store bought. And they’re better (and easy – otherwise I PROMISE I wouldn’t do it).
Each week I also usually bake bread, cookies, granola bars or muffins. The baked goods are a great treat and are healthier and tastier than other options available for purchase. I usually bake these as a side-note…I want to turn on the oven for a dinner and can’t bear the thought of all of that oven space going to waste. So, I whip up something quick and get the most out of my oven heat.
Now, we’re able to enjoy more, for less. Sounds like the name of the cookbook in my kitchen “More with Less”. But it’s true! I feel like I’m at the beginning of discovering so many more things to make and do on my own.
What’s your number one money-saver as a result of doing it yourself?
A Quiet Book for Aby
When Aby turned 1, I wanted to give her something special. So, I created a small quiet book for her. I wanted it to be simple, but also involve manipulation and textures for her to explore. What I came up with was an easy to fold book that my son also loves. Now they each have one quiet book to take along to church. They keep quite busy with these little books.
The book itself was quite simple to make. I used a pair of pants that I bought second hand, some other felt and cloth scraps I had on hand and a few buttons. I sewed most of it, but used a little bit of hot glue for the pocket on the back and for securing Aby’s name.
The cover is simple with a flower and Aby’s name.
The book opens up into one long panel, as you can see below. It folds over like a letter in 3 sections.
On the back of the book (behind the ocean scene) there’s a pocket where some of the fun movable pieces are kept.
For the first section, the section with flowers, I made a butterfly with jingle bells. The bells are purely for fun. Aby has fun shaking the butterfly and hearing the cheerful sound. The butterfly can enjoy the flowers or hide in the grass.
In this same section, once she improves on her fine motor control, Aby will be able to remove the flowers and place them back on. This is great practice for learning to use buttons! For now, little Peanut is enjoying this feature.
The middle section is really quite simple, although I’d venture to say it’s Aby’s favorite. Hide and seek or peekaboo features for little ones are always fun. I used a broken bird pin that I had, of course I checked it for sharp edges first. The bright colors and novelty of a small metal piece intrigue Aby. I hide the bird and then she finds it.
Finally, the ocean section features seaweed, a star button and a few movable creatures: a turtle and two fish.
So, that’s Aby’s birthday quiet book! I had fun making it and hope you also enjoyed it.
Are You Undermining Yourself as a Parent?
“Peanut, time to stop watching videos!”
“No, not yet”
“Yes, finish that one and you’re done.”
A few minutes later…”Peanut, it’s done now, come on.”
It’s like the rumbling of a volcano that’s about to erupt and before I know it I’m grabbing the smartphone from the clutches of a furious green monster who also happens to be my little angel.
Most parents know this story. But, had I let him continue watching, I would be in much worse shape. He would always pull out the furious green monster on me, wondering if it would work to get anything he wants. Thankfully, that’s not the case.
How often are we convinced and manipulated by our kids’ whining insistence? I notice that it happens to a lot of parents and I’m guilty of it at times. When we do this, we undermine ourselves as parents. Giving in without undergoing a negotiation process means that our kids know our weak points and push outside the limits we’ve set for them. And they’re kids, they’ll keep pushing to find out where the boundaries are.
Don’t undermine yourself. Stick to your word. It will make each subsequent experience much, much easier! This doesn’t mean you have to have a totalitarian dictatorship in your home.
There’s a fine line between fair negotiations, where you take into account your child’s feelings and ideas, and permissiveness where you allow your child to run free with absolutely no boundaries. I personally think negotiating is great. It teaches communication and gives you a great opportunity to model empathy.
Here are some rules that help me walk the line between fair negotiations and permissiveness:
1. Ask Nicely
Kids can learn to ask for things nicely. If little Peanut doesn’t say “please” and use a reasonable tone of voice, there’s no negotiating. I do my best to speak respectfully to him, why shouldn’t I expect him to do the same with me? Of course, you have to be careful not to fall into the trap of saying “yes” to everything that’s requested nicely – it’s simply not possible. But, for the most part, “please” and a nice tone of voice can change my mind about coming to an agreement.
2. Is This Round 2?
Have Peanut and I already made an agreement? If so, I stick to it. In the example of watching videos, if we’ve agreed on one more, and after that one he wants to negotiate another one, it’s a no go. Holding my word is important to me – it makes things predictable and he knows that I mean what I say. Otherwise, he’ll constantly be second guessing. So, there’s only one round of negotiating for any request.
3. Is it Safe?
It’s easier to explain your answers when you have a good reason to support them.
“Can I have ice cream for breakfast?”
“No, it’s not good for your body to have only ice cream for breakfast. Let’s have some eggs and toast, and later we’ll have some ice cream.”
Although my 3-year-old may not appreciate it now, it will eventually sink in that health is important. Or,
“Can I watch movies all day?”
“No, it’s ok to watch videos sometimes, but it’s bad for your brain and body to do that all day.”
Rather than using my authoritarian “no,” I give him a real, grown-up reason. I think he deserves to know why I say “no,” even if it’s just “I don’t like it and it’s too loud for me right now.”
How do you balance between sticking to boundaries and taking your child’s feelings and needs into consideration?